After weeks of thought and consideration I finally decided to start up this blog again. Early last night I sat with my finger over the publish button for what seemed like 15 minutes. Finally my husband, Rob pushed it for me.
I was up all night “biting the sheets,” thinking and pining over whether or not I made the right choice by making this commitment. I know the time and responsibility any commitment takes, plus it makes me nervous for so many other reasons. It made me think about when I first started racing…. standing at the starting line I would often times get so nervous I would shake and feel sick. The nasty voices I talked about in “A Reintroduction to a Small Part of World” would creep in grab a hold of my mind. Last night they did the same thing.
I am a new blogger and it is quite like being a new kid at school. I have now run in several races and very rarely do I get so nervous anymore.. Why? Because I have learned that it is wasted energy. When you are running an endurance race you need every ounce of energy your body has. I noticed that when I would not get so jittery before a race, I ran so much faster and felt good through the entire race. Getting nervous and obsessing over whether or not you will do well, wondering “can I even do this?” or getting upset because the race is unorganized can be a complete waste of energy. Energy that you need to do well in the race. I told myself this last night as I lay awake. “Don’t let these thoughts and fear stop you from doing this,” I silently said. I closed my eyes and pictured myself literately sweeping the thoughts out of mind. It worked, I fell asleep and woke up feeling much better about my decision.
I am still a newbie, but I am very fortunate to have a some experienced bloggers and friends who are willing to extend their hand to me, encourage me and, show me the way. Rob McClellan at www.underwatersamurai.com, the one who encouraged my to re-start this blog and designed this site and, even the kind and encouraging words from Natalie at www.mickiruns.wordpress.com . We are all just working our way through life, it means so much to have people so willing to help you along your path.
It is all about conserving energy and finding new ways to get you through the day. The next time you feel yourself letting the evil voices creep in for a race or any other big event in your life, I have found that it really helps to try visualizing something that will help you get rid them, like:
1. Visualize a box in your mind… put the thoughts in the box
2. A broom sweeping them away
3. A bird flying away with them
4. A sledge hammer beating the crap out them
5. Repeat a mantra
Maybe you have something else you like to do… I would LOVE to hear what you do to calm your nerves, eliminate the negative thoughts or, perhaps, you even have a mantra as you run?